When He Loves Another, and Doesn't See You

I'm sure most of you have been attracted, and had develop some type of feelings for a man that loves another. Me & this dude met a while back, and it was nice speaking to someone who has the same taste of music as me, and it is very rare that I would connect with someone on a mental level. Everything was going fine until he told me that his ex had contacted him via a text message. He reveal to me that he was still in love with his ex. I must admit I was a little taken aback when he told me this. In my mind I wondered how can I compete with a person who clearly has his heart. Should I stay, Should I go? These thoughts ran through my head.

He asked me what he should do? There was much compassion, and love in his voice when he said this. It was almost as if he wanted me to give him permission to something he knew he had to do, and that was to tell his ex how he truly felt. So I set my bruised ego aside, and told him that he should tell his ex how he felt. Long story short the ex never responded, and again I felt like I had a chance.

Maybe a week had past, and as my feelings for him grew a little deeper because I finally went to visit him. It was a nice visited, and I understood that my feelings for him were just that feelings, but they were on the pathway of falling in love with him some day. Still he didn't know how I felt, and that my feelings were starting this journey to love.

As my feelings deepen with every phone conversation we had, out of the blue the ex finally contacts him via a phone call. My feelings were hurt because I knew I was about to miss out. When he told me this over the phone. My emotions got the best of me, and I told him how I felt (That was my bruised ego talking) I started thinking as I was telling him how I felt, "Was it fair for me to do this to him?", and it wasn't. I made a decision, and asked him one question, "Does your ex make you happy?", and his answer was, "yes". Then I told him, "That he owe it to himself to see where him, and his ex could go". I told him,"That I rather have him as a friend than to not have him at all in my life because I truly cared about him" (Now that was the real love within me talking).

Don't get me wrong it hurt, but real love itself isn't jealous of another. Real love doesn't restrict another's happiness because you had feelings for a person as if you had some claim to them.

"Real love gives freedom, and Real love is freedom"` Osho

I hope it does work for him because I do want him to be happy. Maybe I was meant to be just a friend. Who knows . . . anyways I learned that you need to set aside your ego, so you can see that if you truly like/love someone, and truly want them to be happy you should step aside and let them have their happiness. That is what real love would do for a person you truly care about.

. . . . . . . . .Lesson Learned.


Big ( Medium ) Mike February 16, 2010 at 10:21 AM  

I agree to an extent, you are right for letting him go, because you were about to be competing with a power you had no way of defeating, but to your credit an ex is an ex for a reason, too many times we hold on to things that aren't good for us, but who's to say his ex isn't, that's just my opinion, that was a very mature thing to do let him go and pursue is heart

THEGAYTEKEEPER February 18, 2010 at 4:40 PM  

It is NEVER a good idea to get involved with someone that still LOVES his ex...

About The Writer

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A young brother working on his craft. In this blog you will see everything from stories, poems to random stuff. I think its important that every one just keeps writing what ever it may be, just keep writing we all got a story to tell. So why not let people hear your story. Plus you will hear some of my favorite music.